Inner Monologue - The Run
Okay, here we go. Training (for the Color Run in Singapore happening in ess than 3 weeks) on actual road for the first time. Remember, 6-7 laps to achieve your goal of 5k. We should walk the first lap, whether it counts or not we'll decide later.
Ehmahgerd I'm so glad I haven't start running yet. So many ma lat lou's all over. Will they stare at my boobs when I jog? Okay avoid eye contact avoid eye contact, with every human. Just look as if you're overly engrossed in your walk/jog/run whatever, eyes on the floor or empty space. Shit what if the ma lat lou's are staring at my ass right now.
Stop being such a bitch, you bitch. It's normal to jog. You're wearing the biggest shirt you have anyway there's nothing to see.
Oh look! Another runner.. no, jogger. Hmm, walker. Yup. This one looks like she's only going to walk and nothing else. I'm not judging her for that but hmm, those shorts are a bad choice. All I see is wobble wobble wobble. Oh man. Stop it, avoid eye contact and keep going.
Posture posture posture. You need to find the best way to conserve energy and minimize injury. But obviously, you know nothing about posture. Remind me to remind you to Youtube it or something later.
GASPGASPGASP. This is harder than being on a treadmill. What with all the uphills and wind. Such drags. Doesn't it feel good though? Wind in your face, closer to nature etc as opposed to being in an air-conditioned room?
Meh. I don't know. All I know is my lungs are working a little too hard right now. Perhaps I should have taken care of them better.
Well it's not too late...
Hmm. This is boring. I don't usually exercise without music. Is that why I'm talking too much? Well it's good to know how a run feels like without music. Speaking of which, shall I do the Color Run with my headphones on or not? Kind of want to soak up the entire environment including sound but then again I think I do better with music on. Perhaps I should train more often without music.
Also, shall I wear goggles when running? I don't want to get those color powders in my eyes. It may just give me the excuse to roll over and die instead of completing the 5k run. So yeah, goggles. Like those cycling ones. Will I look ridiculous running in those? Shit. I'll probably need a face mask too. Okay no, now you're overdoing it.
How I wish I have a GoPro and a body mount though. It's going to be spectacular.
Oh man I can't wait for The Color Run already. As to why I'm so determined to train for it, it's because I want to really enjoy it. I don't want to end up too exhausted or in worst case scenarios, fainting and puking (CHOI! Won't happen). I want to run with a gigantic smile on my face as if running is as easy as breathing.
What if my boobs sag from all these running?
You're kidding right? What boobs? If you were to really run that much, you'll be skinny enough to not have any. Well, unless you're that brunette from Blurred Lines MV. But you're not, so stop worrying about nonexistent issues.
I smell cigarette smoke. Mmm. Just keep running just keep running. You're not even sweating much yet.
Okay I think I had enough for today, even if my body isn't tired, my brain is tired from all the talks. Oh remember the laps you walked? They're going to have to count. You'll do better.
Alright time check! No way. You just did 4km in 40 minutes. What were you doing exactly? Crawling? Couldn't even reach your goal of 5km! Tsk tsk. Well, I'm glad you tried running (or crawling) on the road for real. At least you failed here and not during the actual run itself. Crisis averted! So now what you'll have to do is get used to running on the road and I guess you'll be alright.
Maybe you should do some squats when you get home because oh you know, the last time I checked, you were pretty out of shape. Just saying though. No pressure.
Ehmahgerd I'm so glad I haven't start running yet. So many ma lat lou's all over. Will they stare at my boobs when I jog? Okay avoid eye contact avoid eye contact, with every human. Just look as if you're overly engrossed in your walk/jog/run whatever, eyes on the floor or empty space. Shit what if the ma lat lou's are staring at my ass right now.
Stop being such a bitch, you bitch. It's normal to jog. You're wearing the biggest shirt you have anyway there's nothing to see.
Oh look! Another runner.. no, jogger. Hmm, walker. Yup. This one looks like she's only going to walk and nothing else. I'm not judging her for that but hmm, those shorts are a bad choice. All I see is wobble wobble wobble. Oh man. Stop it, avoid eye contact and keep going.
Posture posture posture. You need to find the best way to conserve energy and minimize injury. But obviously, you know nothing about posture. Remind me to remind you to Youtube it or something later.
GASPGASPGASP. This is harder than being on a treadmill. What with all the uphills and wind. Such drags. Doesn't it feel good though? Wind in your face, closer to nature etc as opposed to being in an air-conditioned room?
Meh. I don't know. All I know is my lungs are working a little too hard right now. Perhaps I should have taken care of them better.
Well it's not too late...
No.
Hmm. This is boring. I don't usually exercise without music. Is that why I'm talking too much? Well it's good to know how a run feels like without music. Speaking of which, shall I do the Color Run with my headphones on or not? Kind of want to soak up the entire environment including sound but then again I think I do better with music on. Perhaps I should train more often without music.
Also, shall I wear goggles when running? I don't want to get those color powders in my eyes. It may just give me the excuse to roll over and die instead of completing the 5k run. So yeah, goggles. Like those cycling ones. Will I look ridiculous running in those? Shit. I'll probably need a face mask too. Okay no, now you're overdoing it.
How I wish I have a GoPro and a body mount though. It's going to be spectacular.
What if my boobs sag from all these running?
You're kidding right? What boobs? If you were to really run that much, you'll be skinny enough to not have any. Well, unless you're that brunette from Blurred Lines MV. But you're not, so stop worrying about nonexistent issues.
I smell cigarette smoke. Mmm. Just keep running just keep running. You're not even sweating much yet.
Story of my life.
Alright time check! No way. You just did 4km in 40 minutes. What were you doing exactly? Crawling? Couldn't even reach your goal of 5km! Tsk tsk. Well, I'm glad you tried running (or crawling) on the road for real. At least you failed here and not during the actual run itself. Crisis averted! So now what you'll have to do is get used to running on the road and I guess you'll be alright.
Maybe you should do some squats when you get home because oh you know, the last time I checked, you were pretty out of shape. Just saying though. No pressure.
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